.....those were the words I was hearing thru the receiver as I spoke to Bruv. "Tigeress, what is your purpose in life?"
For the first time in 28+ years, I actually felt slow talking to my brother. It was as if I was his little sister. Mind you, i've never seen my younger brother as my little brother. He has always been my brother; my younger brother. My brother who for reasons best known to my friends think he is real cool and cute. lol!!! Bruv is real mature tho- only 1yr, 2mths, and a day younger than I am. But today, i felt like his little sister cos I could not answer that question- What is my purpose in life? Eeerrrrr..............
He went on to say something which I totally agree with and hope other folks will heed to his reasoning (especially women)........he goes, "Don't let marriage define you. Your purpose in life can not be getting a husband". It was refreshing to hear that from a man, espeically in a culture where marriage does define a lot of us. A culture where a successful single career woman is not seen has a success, but seen as a pathetic (or angry lonely woman) situation compared to a married jobless pigeon. A culture that insinuates that a woman's crown (ade ori) is a husband. Now tell me, who doesn't want a crown/tiera?!!!
At my age, i really don't know what my purpose in life is. I really dont know what I'm suppose to be/ become. I don't know what I'm passionate about; better still there is nothing I'm passionate about, but I have dreams/hopes/business idea(s)/etc.............................but none of which i'm passionate about. One thing i know I really hope to do is to touch the lives of as many orphans (my children) as possible. But to do that (to adopt), I need to be in a financial position to take care of all my children.
Tigeress, what is your purpose in life?
Right now, i'm trying to keep my head above the water so as not to drown. Right now I need God's intervention in my career so that my drive does not die. Right now, i need to be delivered from my JOB (Just Over Broke) before I completely lose hope. For those of you who are on H1B and on top of that in a common field such as Finance- will know and understand the challenges one faces. But Bruv said one thing, "Tigeress, even if you get GC and still don't have a purpose in life- you'll still feel hollow." Eeeemmmmmmmm..................true, but........eeeemmmmm.......
So I ask you guys, what is your purpose in life? Why are you on earth? And do you also think that there are some of us who leave this earth without living a purpose filled life or not having a passion?
I guess it's time I read the book- Purpose Driven Life.
27 comments:
Firsttttttttttttttt!!!!!!!!!!!
Hell yeah!!!
Finally!
And Im second too....
Im also in the middle of reading that book too...but.
Im still as lost as I can be.
Unless maybe I need to read it again...
With regards to u wanting to touch the ives of many children...u tried big brothers big sisters?
I did it and it was hard, but now, I can def say I loved it....
In fact let me mark my spot!
THIRDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!
ok I'll leave the rest for you guys...
lool
mehn deep stuvs. This one got me thinking sha. I so t even lie.
Someone sees the light in the tunnel!
It shocks me when gurls live only to be wives....really?
Me....
as i have always said.."on that road to discovering who i truly am"
i do know i love science....give me a bunch of chemicals and a lab and i am as happy as a bunny( that rhymed :)
so what is my purpose u say?
to use what i have been given to mark my spot in this world...
what have i been given?
that, is the right question....
*break in transmission*
@ Chayoma lets not judge the ladies out there who do live to be a wife because if that's what they feel is their purpose they should not be judged just as singles shouldn't be judged for being single & wanting to do other things. :-)
@ Tigeress...
I think society views single women as high school students and wives as uni graduates, parents as masters holders and finally grandparents as PHD Alumni.
So yeah maybe right now I am that high school kid in society's eyes but boy do I dream like a PHD holder. I dream that I will have my own charity that assists young orphans in my home country. That I will have a successful website where Africa's developmental challenges and breakthrough's are highlighted.
Can someone tell me where in the bible it says that a woman should/has to marry? I do believe (im not too well versed in the bible) that Jeremiah was told by God not to marry because that was not his purpose. Jesus didn't get married because that was not his purpose.
*break* found the bible passage I was looking for READ 1CORINTHIANS 32-39. The gist of it is that as an unmarried person you are more devoted to God and are not split by concerns such as how to please hubby, wifey, kids etc etc.
That was deep, tygarr...
Your brother struck a chord with me. You are blessed to have someone like dat put things in perspective.
I pray you, and indeed we all, discover our purpose in life. I'm sure we will too.
True words by ur bro.
I've been asking myself the same question...and also trying to figure out what am passionate about. But I noticed that I was over-thinking, and analyzing the situation and generally just beating myself down so much that I was loosing sight of the positives things around me and within me.
And I decided that the answer won't come by force, and I cnt google it up. So I simply ask God to please order my steps to my calling and open my eyes and my heart to recognize it when I get there.
It’s so hard not to feel this way when you feel you have done and given everythin you can humanly give and nothing seems to fall into place. I’m sometimes as confused as you in tryin to determine what exactly my purpose is.
Although I know im passionate about so many things which brings a sense of fulfillment but as far pin pointin, im still on my knees prayin to God to be able to decipher it.
Be courageous, and always know that only God makes everythin beautiful in his own time, married or unmarried..
Cheers and Best wishes.
That is a good question but I too have no answer to it and I am okay with it. There was a time where it worried me that I did not know what my purpose was but I have come to find out that I will drive myself crazy if I try to figure out. I always say my twenties have been the most confusing years of my life so far, so I have decided to just focus on a goal, do all within my power to achieve the goal and hope everything falls into place all the while making room for errors. I have things I am passionate about, some know their purpose and some don't, whichever group one falls into, I think its okay as long as you are working towards something.
I've actually never thot about my purpose in life. Half of the time I take one day at a time and just try to live today better than yesterday. That for me is fine. I dont let things around me define me that is not to say that I do not feel the pressure of not attaining what others around me expect me to attain. It's a constant battle but as long as you always manage to keep ur head above water, then you're winning.
P.S.
I agree with Taynement all the way.
I'll be honest- I don't know my purpose or calling eithere, but I do know that every step I take I am closer, and because my prayer to Him is-
Lord, please lead me to where you have called me to be, and who you have called me to be, and Open my eye to know when I get there.
I was REALLY disturbed for 2 Whole years- not knowing what I wanted to do with my life- worryng didn't change anything- so I put my eyes on Him, knowing he can't fail me- What I do know is that He will lead and I will follow, and where I fall- He will carry me.
So .....whether I have a passion or not right now- can be changed in a spilt second.
Guess when push comes to shove the answer to THAT question may be the only thing that keeps us going........
That question is what keeps me going, I have been asked that question a lot of times but have not been able to answer it.
I have also refused to be defined by marriage or man. I have defined myself for me and the way I want it to be.
Nice one. Have a lovely weekend
My purpose in life is to utilize the education I have in making a difference for myself and my family and the society.. I want to live a live a life without financial constraints. I want to be a giver, like my parents. To show love to those around me and to positively impact on the lives of people I am not in any way related to. And while doing all this, my ultimate goal is to pursue happiness. Whether married or single, young or old, I want to live a happy life. And being happy these days is so hard; but I know that God will take the wheel.Our generation will revolutionalize the way Nigerians feel about marriage, not only because a lot of mature women are staying single (and happier than their married counterparts) or because even more women will walk out of failing marriages, but because from what we have learned will help us teach our daughters to find themselves and live their lives before marriage, not after. And maybe finding a good person won’t be so hard for them. Till then, my sister, the struggle continues! The only hope is the few happily married people I see around me.Omo! See epistle! Sorry for the long comment, have a lovely weekend dear! For books to read, I recommend “The woman I am Becoming’ by T. Suzzanne Eller and all the books in the ‘Diva’ series by Michelle McKinney Hammond
Honestly, I've never had a defined purpose. Most times i just take each day as it comes and although i've been called shallow, purposeless and what not by friends and family alike, its just the way i am. No apologies.
Basically, I think the only person allowed to define me(or anyone else except yourself of course) and who can tell me what my purpose is is God. All i have to do is ask Him...I know He's waiting for me to do just that (guess thats why i keep taking him for granted).
Deep post + I like your brother...you're lucky to have some1 like him (me thinks)
iv read the book by Rick Warren...it was gd guide / knowledge
Very thought-provoking post (you've got a wise brother!), and I find as I get older, I wonder more about what my purpose is and whether I am working toward it. Most of the time I do think I am, and sometimes I get a glimmer that my life is meant to be about helping others.
I think I have a copy of Warren's book somewhere but have never read it. Maybe it's time.
That's easy. To be a writer.
Well my purpose is to make sure that all Africans have good, affordable health care, starting in Nigeria. And to have COPIOUS amounts of SEX!!!! And have lovely babies, and study languages, and be president of Nigeria before I turn 60. That is my purpose.... Did I mention the sex bit. I also want to be a wife. To pick one normal man and help guide him into becoming a truly extraordinary human being. So health for Africa, SEX...SEX, Languages, Babies, and being a GREAT wife oh and PRESIDENT and maybe the Secretary General of the UN. Those are my purposes in life. lol.
Have a lovely week chicken and you already know what your purpose is, its inside you, all you need to do is be still enough to hear what your heart is telling you. And did you just say that you are waiting to adopt yyour children. Start with one and you will be surprised at the awesome grace of our God.
i av asked myself this question so many times, and always come up with a way-less-than-perfect answer. U r right wen u say we need Gods intervention.
Babe, ur life is in God's hands, so dnt bug urself!
PS..i av missed ya!
btw, is ur bro single? lol!
Oh yayy...Aloted recommended that I read that book as well...
I'm sure you'll figure everything out...Leave it all in God's hands...Do your best and you'll be amazed as you watch Him do the rest :)
Of which, I think I know my purpose...I just don't know how best to go about achieving it...*sigh*
Very thot-provoking question...I still ask myself often; what's my purpose...I believe I know it, or at least part of it...and I'm trusting God to lead me fully into it...
The Purpose Driven Life is a good book to read, and you might also like my hubby's post on the subject; http://fseye.wordpress.com/2009/03/23/what-am-i-here-for/
All d best with discovering ur life's purpose (btw, caring for/adopting orphans is soooo part of it...)
Just Toluwa- Missed you too sweets. My bro is single- kinda. I like you so i wont introduce you to him cos me sef i find his single status questionable. Rumor has it tht he isn't but he claims he's single to me.
Well I understand babe, what you might be going through. I am at the same place. Our purpose in life is to serve God and nothing else... All this husband matter don tire me jare.
Late comment but my absolute FAVORITE post in your blog (am still reading)....deeep indeeD! I am still searching. in the mean time...i just try to pursue my passions...no matter how silly or small it seems...baby steps. following what trully makes me happy....and all other things will be Added. By his grace.
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