Man-wrapper Friends

My fellow bloggers, my name is TIGERESS and NOT Tigress. I’ve tried to ignore it but….

Our recent blog on The African Women got me thinking about friendship. It’s interesting to see that I’m not the only one that seems to have questions regarding friendship. I’ve seen quite a few blogs lately talking about friendship. I’m sure most of us have experienced the viciousness, the back stabbing, the jealousy, the using (yes friends can use you), the cattiness, man/woman stealer etc. The breaking of trust. You confide in a friend and he/she goes to tell another your story. Gossip. Bitching. And yes, men too behave like this. I’m sorry but if as a loyal friend you experience such- there is no way you can tell me it’s not heart breaking.

I want to talk about man-wrapper friends. Friends who use you when they are not in a relationship and dump your ass as soon as they get bf; and when in turn their ass gets dumped or the relationship just doesn’t work out- they pick you back up or look for another friend to use. I want to talk about friends who becos they don’t have the ability to be single; they must either be in a relationship or have a prominent toaster; who during the in-between of such waiting periods exert all that attention they would normally pay a bf- unto a friend. (I hope that made sense). As you can figure out, this is for the ladies. Now, I’ve never been a man wrapper nor have I been one of those girls that because of man I neglect my friends. I honestly do not comprehend the correlation between having a bf and going MIA on ur friends. Then again, maybe I just haven't met that guy that was so fantastic/ great that he’ll make me see no use of my friends and therefore revolve my life around him. Haven't met such a guy yet. Now notice that I say bf. Cos most of the women who do go MIA are not those who are married- they are the ones who have mere bf. BOYFRIEND not even husband. Hisssssssss! This is 2009- any friend that drops me becos of man had better pray to God almighty she ends up marrying the dude cos I for sure will be MIA on her ass if things don’t work out and she comes running back to me. And if you do get married to the dude- don’t expect me to jump hoops for your wedding. Find someone else to use. I’m not tissue paper that u use and chuck out when done with. I have emotions mehn!!!!!! Lol.

Now I have a friend who is single and has the tendency to relate to you like u’re her bf e.g. wanting to talk 1st thing in the morning, during work, while driving, last thing at nite etc. Well ‘yawl’ know I aint friendly like that, I don’t have time for such nonsense- I nipped that shii in the bud quick quick. Cos I for one CAN NOT and WILL NOT provide any woman with the emotional and communication needs gotten from a man. I do not relate to or communicate with any of my friends in the same manner as I would with a bf. Even though I have never known this friend of mine while in a relationship I KNOW for a fact that she is the clingy type and a typical man wrapper. And she herself admitted that that was how she was in her last relationship- and is making every conscious effort not to repeat that same mistake. My question to all those ladies that have these tendency- where are the men now? Where are they o??!!!!!! Where?!!!! Be following man like duhduhsco. Meanwhile you do not follow God like that. These are the kinda ladies that when single you’ll see them in Church and sometimes become workers. But as soon as they sniff the possibility of having BOYFRIEND (bf wahala!!), they forget God. Man becomes their God. If they can forsake God, then who are you then? Mere human. Of course they will drop their friends.

How often do you guys communicate with your close friends? Me- on an average of about 3days a week. And there have been times when it has been more frequent per week. I’m not a phone person so for me to be on the phone for more than 30mins- that gist must be on FIRE!!! But don’t get me wrong, I do have 1 or 2 friends that I do spend up to an hour or 2 gisting with from time to time.

I don’t even know what I was trying to get at now. I’ve been distracted so many times.

Anyway, I just want someone to tell me or justify why girls behave like this. I’m not gonna front, I’m emotionally attached to my close friends. But why do some girls feel its okay to neglect a friend when in a relationship and then clog up your phone when things aren’t working out? When I say neglect I mean not hear from them for weeks.

Why do women feel slightly envious when things are going well for you? Why is it okay for you to be the first one to find a bobo and not the other way around i.e. Why that slight envy when ur friend gets into a relationship while you’re still single.

Why is there a need to bitch about ur friend behind their back? Why is there that slight glee when things aren’t going right for your friend? Not going right in the areas which things aren’t going well for you – be it relationship, career, business etc

Why can't women learn to be alone??

Why do some transfer all that ‘man affection’ on to a female friend and then set themselves up for disappointment when the female friend gets a man? Of course your female friend is not gonna communicate with you 24/7 when she gets into a relationship. Or why would you transfer that love to a female friend and then suddenly go MIA as soon as a man is on board?