Credit Crunch: Aristo needed!!

I’m very sure I’m not the only one feeling this so called credit ‘crunsh’. Well this credit crunch is soooo whooping my ass that I’ve decided to obtain an Aristo. Therefore I am open to eligible applicants that meet the following requirements:

• Vibrant
• Easy on the eyes. Stud muffin wld be nice but not a must.
• No over-the-belt pot belly WHATSOEVER!!!
• Must not exceed the age of 45 and must not be below 27
• Gives head or at least willing to learn
• If married, must not be territorial, and under no circumstances consider getting me knocked up (i.e. making me baby-mama) or making me wife no.2 or Yankee wife. Not gonna happen!!
• If single, must not be territorial except if he considers changing my status from Aristoree to MRS.
• And most importantly, must have surplus funds and be VERY generous.

I’m not demanding (I no be awoof); I promise to be a good Aristoree. What I need covered:

• Mortgage
• Rent
• Grocery
• Car note
• Pocket money for essentials such as tampax, deodorant, and bus pass.

Now depending on the Aristo’s level of generosity, services I shall be providing are as follows:

• Food. If all he covers is the above basic essential needs, then food served will include but no be limited to noodles, bread and egg, gari etc. But if he throws in additional provisions like shopping sprees, designer gears, savings/trading funds, trips to the Carribean, Dubai, Europe, basically wherever I want to go to all over the world, then food served shall include pounded yam, egusi, efo, amala and ewedu, goat meat, ogbono, moin-moin, fried rice with BIG prawns/shrimps, chicken, turkey, and exotic food such as Thai, Jamaican etc.
• Good head- 5mins for basic provisions. Over 5mins for additional provisions.
• Good Nukie, but extra acrobatic moves will be included if Aristo gives additional provisions.
• There shall be no clogging up the phone
• Under no circumstances will I try to make myself wife, wife no.1, wife no.2, side wife, or Yankee wife.
• Under no circumstances will I be falling in love except I consent to a single Aristo changing my status from Aristoree to MRS.
• Under no circumstances will I trap you into becoming my baby-daddy
• I shall not be territorial

As I have provided pictures, please remember to send in your pictures when sending your application to tigeress2much@gmail.com. Application should include bank statements, birth certificate to verify age, proof of income/job/business- as drug dealers, yahoozes, 419 artists, swindlers WILL NOT be considered.


SORRY PICTURE HAS NOW BEEN REMOVED!! :):)


Disclaimer: Please be aware that this advert for an Aristo is solely for entertainment purposes and should not be taken seriously. Pictures of model have been purchased from www.modelsforads.com.